“Peace, the feeling is hard to describe", I said. My mentor replied: "What do you mean that the feeling is indescribable? Maybe by saying that you're actually censoring something that can be uplifting, inspiring and helpful to others. You're holding it down and everything held down has to rise...” I was having my first one-to-one session with her as part of her “Tell Your Story” virtual writing workshop. So I hope you find the telling of my story helpful.
Lying stretched out lazily on the sofa like a cat at rest, it crept up on me. “What is this?”, I said to myself and brought my full attention to it. I began to notice within me a softly pulsating sensation. I felt it from just above my navel, the middle of my body downwards, filling up the entire space.
I anchored my consciousness on this stillness, this feeling of a living, limitless and boundless presence abiding in the confines of my body. The stillness that I felt was so delicious that I could not have enough of it. I, the thinking mind and self that exists in the world, entered into this inner stillness and became one with this pure, soundless, unfathomable, vibrating phenomenon. It felt like a bottomless well of happiness and I just wallowed in the joy of it. There was no colour, no sound, but there was a super subtle aliveness to it.
The feeling of contentment, bliss and joy that came from this pure inner quietness is what I'm calling peace. I had not created it. It had made its presence known to me. Or I had possibly made myself known to it.
This was not a mind experience, the sensation was totally in my body, and of course the body is generally in the here and now. It was a physical and tangible experience. My mind was subordinate to this peace. There was no thinking. No Blah, blah, blah mind chatter. Only being present in the moment. I felt love, protection and “is-ness” in that peace.
It bring tears to my eyes right now having felt and known this inner presence and losing that connection – but not forever.
I know that I can get back to that space when I build in a daily meditation practice – walking outdoors in the park and even being at home chanting Aum, meditating, relaxing, doing breathing exercises.
Also when I take time away from my normal routines, I find that the tranquility comes more easily because I'm away from the busy city and in an environment where I can just be with no chores, work or other daily activities to distract me.
Physicist have shown that everything in the universe is energy. So being energy, I can vibrate at a higher level and life flows so much better. And please don't think that vibrating at an higher level is some whoo-whoo stuff. I can literally feel the vibration in my body. So this is not some nonsense as your mind may be suggesting right now.
When I am calm and still inside, I feel centred and my thinking is clearer, my confidence increases, I can push the edges of what I do and with the greater clarity of mind, my performance and productivity increases.
This is the opposite of being stressed, panicky and anxious where clarity, performance and productivity decrease.
If you are feeling that you would like to take time “away from the mundaneness of [your] world.” as one participant of my India, 2018 retreat put it and would like to discover more of who you are and feel called to at least find out more then I invite you to go here for more information about the India 2019 retreat.
The greatest gift from this experience was knowing for myself that this amazing inner quiet is a deeper aspect of who am I. It felt like my source and I literally can call on this inner source for help.
For example, when learning to ride a bicycle (I was an adult learner) and after having an accident where the front wheel of the bicycle swung and hit a barrier while I was trying to cycle throw a rather narrow gap. I went flying into the air, arms and legs flailing and landed with a thump on my buttock with the impact reverberating up my entire spine.
Well, afterwards, as I cycled along the road that goes around the park, at the narrow gaps at the five barriers, I would start to breath faster, my heart would pump faster, I got hot and sweaty as I approached the gaps because my mind-body system had registered them as danger points and take me into fight, flight or freeze state. So, I would get off the bicycle and walk through.
Then after this happened a few times, one day I thought, I really must get over this. So as I felt the fear rising up, I spoke to my inner self and asked for help to be calm and present in the moment. I took a few deep breaths and consciously focused my attention in the here and now , first in my body, then at the road in front of me and then at the gap ahead (not the barrier). Suddenly, I felt calmness rise up from around my navel and solar plexus area, my body relaxed and mind calm and in the moment.
I cycled through the first gap and when I came to the gap where the accident occurred my focus and calm remained and I cycled through it effortlessly. In fact, I was amazed at how wide, the formally narrow gaps were – that's why others use to cycle though them so easily.
Interestingly, my fingerprints show that I am in the School of Peace. The life school is one's spiritual foundation on Earth. I am here to learn about and master peace.
This life school symbolises your personal development theme. Mine is to develop the capability to feel safe in my body and on the planet. Inner peace is the life theme and this means developing the ability to move from panic or paralysis to peace. It's learning to feel, rather than ignore the panic, to get to peace.
If you're in the School of Love your design is to develop self-acceptance, emotional authenticity and emotional clarity rather than stuffing feelings and having emotional outbursts.
The School of Service is about developing your ability to give joyous service rather than service becoming an obligation that is burdensome, or feels like servitude or mere self indulgence.
In the School of Wisdom, your training is to develop the skills to use your knowledge and wisdom and to make decisions and take decisive action rather than sitting on the fence or taking action that is reckless.
Your Life School is like your operating system. It influences how you are with other people and even how you operate at work and brand your business.
Would you like to discover your Life School. If so, I have a special offer, as it's my birthday month and the Summer holidays, to discover not just your life school but also your life purpose and life lesson from your fingerprints. Normally, my sessions are £297. HOWEVER, until Monday night, 7th August, you can claim this special with me for ONLY 197.
The session will be online via Skype or Zoom and will be recorded. You can be located anywhere not just London. Once you book, you will be sent a printing kit to take your hand prints, which you then send to me for analysis. The session will be 60 minutes. Maybe you want to get a session for your child, spouse or business associate? Go here for more information and to order now
