The film Collateral Beauty opens with Will Smith stepping on to the stage and asking the audience: “What's your big Why?” I was watching this film on the aeroplane on the way back to London from Bali where I'd spent two weeks on a business accelerator programme. A major theme of the programme was getting clear about our “Why” for waking up each morning and doing what we do in business.
Paul Dunn, the first mentor on day 1, had said, “If you've lost your way, it could be because you've lost your why.”
I realised that I was not very clear about my why for doing what I do every day and this was true for most of us – eighteen of us attended the programme.
Do you know your big why for being on the planet and doing what you do each day?
For many people it's to do with family - their children, parents. For others it's wanting to make a difference in the world and the big why is tied to a cause or belief of some kind like eradicating poverty locally and globally or empowering women or developing global solutions for health and wellbeing.
When you know your big why, you have more clarity of purpose. What you do has more meaning, more impact and moves you towards your purpose.
In Collateral Beauty, Will Smith's character, states that love is a big why – giving and receiving love.
Paul Dunn in his mentoring session stated that connection is why we're here and that it's what gives meaning and purpose to our lives.
I pondered this because I hear this a lot. It's like people saying that enlightenment is the goal and then this becomes another desire trap. So is this also the case for love? Perhaps love is central because we live in a world where the more we are connected due to technology the more people feel increasingly disconnected on an emotional level and so connection becomes paramount. If you live in a war zone then peace is at the top of the agenda.
Simon Sinek in his famous TED talk “How Great Leaders Inspire Action” tells us that they do so by starting inside out. Not with logical, analytical statements about what they do and how they do it but with why they do what they do – why they get out of bed each day, what they believe , with their purpose and mission. Why is this important?
Because people connect with your why, with what you believe and not what and how you do something.
What a paradox! The mind and analytical thinking are revered in modern society yet what really inspires people is how they feel and what they believe about something. It is well researched, for example, that we make decisions based on emotions and then use logic to justify and confirm the choice.
Paul Dunn gave a process for finding your big why. Say into a voice recorder:
I get up every morning to ____________ so that___________.
Fill in the blanks. It's best to record the statement rather than write it down because as he puts it, when you write it down that's not the real you.
If you're not sure that you have an all encompassing why you can use this statement,
For now, I get up every morning to ____________ so that___________.
So I've just revised my why for now and added global to leader. It raises the stakes. It took several attempts and feels inspiring. Is it big enough? Good question. Here it is:
“I get up every morning to be a global leader in the movement for global health and wellbeing for all so that people everywhere can enjoy inner wellbeing, feel that they matter, be their purpose and be empowered to create their dream and make their maximum contribution in the world.”
Knowing your why means that what you doesn't feel like a daily grind. You're not just doing what you do for the weekly or monthly pay cheque.
Roger Hamilton who is the creator of iLab, the programme I attended, in his mentoring session made the point that we all have limits to consciousness especially when we want to move from one level of business (or career) to another.
A big goal can create a vacuum between where you are (current reality) and where you want to get to (desired outcome). It's therefore important to have a plan that suits you and your consciousness level and will move you forward to your goal. The plan, if it is precise enough, will slice through your consciousness blockage. The plan is your way out of the blockage. Sometimes, it means that you may need to think bigger and have a bigger why. This is because what you do will impact the legacy you leave for the future and if there isn't enough precision and action, you may let down past and future generations.
That statement moved me because I realised that it's not just about the present or us as individuals or our family and friends. Yes, it's good that the big why is about these things but at a bigger level it's really about humanity and living a truly blissful life.
We all have a responsibility to create a future that future generations will be proud of and that will be about inclusion, collaboration, expansion of the human spirit and caring for the planet.
I believe that a shift in consciousness and connection to the greater source is necessary for this to happen.
Teaching yoga, decoding life purpose through hand analysis and coaching people to tap into more of their inner wisdom, innate potential and to live with purpose are all contributions to this why. It's about empowering women and men who feel disempowered. It's helping them to come to the realisation that they truly matter.
All of this creates a legacy not for me but for the world also – one person at a time.